Deck the Halls With Safety and Joy
Federal Employees and Public Safey Concerns
As Federal Employees we live in a nation of – reaction. Recently the subject of violence against women has filled the airways and nightly news. Violence against women is nothing new and when we become more pro-active as opposed to being re-active, such issues will be openly addressed, explored and moved to resolution status. Both men and women can be the victims of violence. However, it appears that women are more often the victims of domestic violence than men. Physical strength is probably one of the primary causes of women being victimized disproportionately by men. We could name a number of reasons why violence is a consistent menu item in many domestic situations across all socio-economic, racial and cultural lines.
Many women become silent enablers because they feel ashamed and think society might give them some particular label if they are being beaten by men in their lives. Perhaps, they don’t want to break up their families, ruin careers, or change life-styles. It might be a number of reasons but I was taught early in life that love does not require bandages. The one thing that exposes the secrets in the basement is open communication. Once you start talking, you will soon understand that what is in your basement is not unique to you. I have a dear friend, an esteemed news reporter, who told me about how she was both verbally and physically abused by her boyfriend. She told me he made her feel ugly and unwanted until one day she felt it would be easier to be without a home temporarily than to continue being abused by a man who said he loved her. No bandages, please.
I love her and admire her for telling me the story because my beautiful, talented, gracious friend does not own that story alone. She was one of the brave ones, one of the lucky who got out with her life, reclaimed her dignity and went on to be a well-known reporter and inspiration to many. The Military is a tough place to be for active duty service men and women and their families. These individuals who make so many sacrifices for the safety of their nation face, particularly in the time of war, circumstances we cannot begin to imagine. Is it possible that they may return to their families and friends psychologically and emotionally impacted and broken by the ugliness of war, death and killings.
I have never seen a person or an animal shot or killed except on television and I grimace at the thought. I cannot even begin to imagine living with having taken someone’s life even in battle. To be a soldier is not easy and we need to understand the psychological trauma these brave men and women must endure. Although soldiers are certainly not the only individuals who experience violence in their homes or their environments, it is something that knows no name, no color, no gender, no socioeconomic status, no letters behind one’s name.
Many organizations, federal and private and the military have Employee Assistance Programs (EAP) focused on assisting employees who have troubles. As a seasoned leader of HR on both the federal and private side, I know that EAP is not enough in its current format to do the job and render the services needed to support people in crisis and their families. It is all too often that employers and places of work, not properly trained in recognizing and handling the dynamics of crisis and mental health issues, contribute to the already fragility of many employees.
The holiday season is a time of joy and celebration. It is also a time where many experience depression, loneliness, sadness and despair. It is time where we must be cognizant and vigilant about – Am I My Brother’s, My Sister’s Keeper? Yes, I am. Yes, you are. When even one us suffer on the planet, somehow, someway, eventually it trickles down to all of us. Be safe, be mindful of others for the sake of your safety and theirs and the joy and prosperity of our nation.
P. S. Always Remember to Share What You Know.
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